Behavior charts don't seem to work for my daughter. She gets more upset when she doesn't get her "sticker". Should I stop using them? -Laurie, Kansas

Laurie,
First, you might want to reevaluate your chart. Are your expectations too high? Can your daughter be successful with the chart you set up? Did your daughter help you pick the rewards? Will the rewards motivate her? These are all important questions you need to ask when setting up your behavior chart. Setting up a chart takes time and a bit of readjustment now and then. Take a look at our page on Using Behavior Charts.

If you decide that a chart just isn't working, that's o.k. Charts aren't the best method for all kids. Continue to be positive, and give your daughter encouragement for at least trying the chart. Try to complete the week you set up to model consistency for her. Then, try some other options. Maybe you can go back to a behavior chart at a later time. Maybe not. The most important thing is to stay positive.

My son really likes the rewards of his behavior chart, but his behavior has already gotten better. When do I end the chart? Helen, Ohio

Helen,
It's great that your son had a positive experience with his behavior chart! When your child's target behavior is achieved, you can stop the chart. Finish out the chart for the week. And, even though you see your child demonstrating the target behavior, use the chart another week or two to reinforce the behavior and give your child some time to practice. Then, you can stop. Let him know what a great job he did on the chart, and if he enjoys it, start working on another behavior.

Ok, we are trying to set some contracts for our 16 year old daughter. She thinks because she has been good with her ipod and phone that I have no right to interfere. We have had lots of trouble in the past. When I checked her ipod today she had been on face time at 1:00 AM. What is the best way to handle making changes? She has ODD and we have to be careful. She tells me that she is not doing anything and that is an old contact. I don't believe her. Just need some advice. Thanks

Jan,
First, you might want to check out our article "The Oppositional Defiant Child: The War At Home". This article will give you some great insights and tips on how to manage a child with ODD. As the article mentions, you need to avoid arguments with your child and use very clear and consistent rules and consequences. More than other children, a child with ODD will argue until you're exhausted and continue to defend herself and make excuses for her behavior. So again, don't get into verbal battles. You are on the right track with setting up a behavior contract regarding her cell phone/ipod use. Let her know exactly what you expect from her and the exact consequences she will receive if she does not abide by the contract. Be consistent and follow through with consequences. You can use one of our contracts or use one as a guide to make up your own. Also, you might want to make an addition to the contract that she needs to surrender her electronics every evening at a certain time. You can hold her devices until morning. Don't forget to reward her for good behavior, also. If she follows the contract, have a reward set up. Involve her in the process, too. Kids are often great at thinking up consequences and rewards for themselves. In fact, they are sometimes too hard on themselves! If you need us to make up a contract or chart for you, let us know. Good luck and don't forget to maintain a patient, non-confrontive attitude with your daughter!

Thank you so much for visiting our website! Our charts are free to print off. And, if you would like a special character on a chart or a chart to target a specific behavior, we can make that up for you free of charge, too.